God's Mercies Are New Every Morning (too bad the kids get home in the afternoon) (Kindle Edition) Review

God's Mercies Are New Every MorningWow!This is clearly the best book I've ever written!A page-turner from the beginning to the part where I totally cash in on it!!I've never made more money off the exploits of my children!!

In the words of my mother,"I'm so proud of you Richie!!Now, when are you having more grandkids?"

In the words of my father, "For this we sent him to four years of college?He says school instead we get jokes about our lovely grandkids??!?I want my money back...."

According to the New York Times (assuming they'd review it this way, which they haven't, but I'm sure it would go something like this):

"This is clearly the best book ever written ever!!!Burn all the books you've ever owned and buy multiples copies of this one!!!"

Seriously, if you don't buy this book you're a terrible person and totally support terrorists or something.If you DO buy this book you have my personal guarantee you are an awesome person!

Because...if you're not having fun you missed the point of it all :)

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Product Description:
A funny, inspirational book written by a father of six and a husband of one.Richie shares his adventures being a police officer in the arctic, chasing polar bears out of the yard, and cleaning peanut butter off of the walls (and baby).

A light book that will keep you laughing and inspire you to never, ever have kids.

Excerpt from the book:

"When Tam got home I proudly showed her the wreckage of the kitchen as evidence that I managed to accomplish what only a father would call a successful dinner.Most of the children were covered in orange cheese-flavored sauce to which was clinging a surprisingly large quantity of intact macaroni noodles (and for some reason a Lego or two).They looked like some sort of monsters from the original Star Trek.I can only assume the toddlers found some sort of candy somewhere because their hands from fingers to elbows and their faces from chins to foreheads were covered in some sort of colorful sticky substance that vaguely suggested they had recently killed and eaten a clown.

I pointed out that Zak and Hannah ate macaroni. Caleb had eaten half a bowl of macaroni, three graham crackers he found under the couch, and an orange crayon.

My smile faltered slightly as I indicated the toddlers, but I just pointed at them like the stains upon them and all the furniture within lunge distance was de-facto proof that they must have eaten something.

Tam then closed her eyes, pinched her nose, and took a deep breath in such a way that suggested she was overcome with emotion at how well I'd done.Obviously I'm the best husband ever.

However, the vein which started throbbing on her forehead suggested that she wasn't as entirely thrilled as I expected her to be.I assumed this can only mean something went wrong at the library.

Tam then asked if the baby has been fed

I quickly masked my look of horror/panic as I realized I have no idea where I left the baby!!!"


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